


Memento Mori

by strwbrryhyuck



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Blood, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Past Abuse, doyoung is death personified
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-14
Updated: 2020-01-14
Packaged: 2021-02-27 07:47:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,870
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22253638
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/strwbrryhyuck/pseuds/strwbrryhyuck
Summary: Doyoung watches as the honey-haired boy with soft skin and dimples dances his last dance, and he wishes he could look away.
Relationships: Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung
Comments: 6
Kudos: 41





	Memento Mori

Death was not easily impressed, eons of existence numbing him to the point of callousness and uncaring. What was the point of frail, mortal bodies on an unremarkable speck in the grand scheme of the universe?

And then came Jung Jaehyun, borne of mortal body, the unremarkable, fragile flesh that is the human race created the utterly remarkable, soft-fleshed and otherworldly creature that entranced Death.

He was beautiful, and Doyoung was deeply enamored in all that was the beautiful human boy with a stunning smile and honey-layered voice. Doyoung couldn’t help but fall, the kind-hearted boy growing into a kind-hearted man. He grew up pious and virtuous, but was weak to his lustful ways when he became a man. He was sinful as much as he was a saint, falling into the arms of lovers with whispered promises and mean hands. Oftentimes, the night would end with tears on his rosy cheeks and bruises on his smooth flesh. He chalked it up to God punishing him for his sinful acts, always covering the ugly colors with dark clothes and layers of makeup, always on his knees praying for forgiveness until that same night he was on his knees for different purposes.

Doyoung wanted to tell him how far from the truth he was for multiple reasons, but he did not. Instead, he watched him, a predator hunting its prey. Doyoung couldn’t help it, as Death he should not have been so caught up in life, yet here he was, entranced by a mere mortal body.

Maybe it was because Jaehyun was so unlike any other mortal he’s laid his eyes upon before. He could tell that Jung Jaehyun was pure in every way, no matter who tainted his skin or corrupted him from the inside out, making his blood turn acidic and starved him of affection and love. True affection and love, something Doyoung so desperately wanted to provide for him. 

He was entranced, but even if he could not stray away from Jaehyun, he could not save him either.

The mortal was too caring, too trusting, too docile. Doyoung watched as who Jaehyun called his lover stabbed him over and over and over and over again, a bloody end in a dark alley for a pink-fleshed, honey-voiced mortal. Crimson against once rosy skin, supple flesh turned cold and gray, left to bleed out.

Now, Doyoung stares at his lifeless corpse in silence, expression blank.

He reaches out to touch Jaehyun’s hand, body vibrating.

Without life, this body was not Jung Jaehyun. And like his body, life was not life without Jung Jaehyun. Doyoung knew from this point forward, the mortal bodies responsible for his death, any amount of suffering would suffer the same way he did. Life was not life without his boy, and his boy was gone.

But there was more to come, and the future of the mortal beings who allowed such a tragedy to occur would wait. 

It was time for a performance, one last flare from an extinguished light.

Doyoung watches as the lifeless limbs of Jaehyun shift, ligaments twitching and tight flesh expanding over stiff muscle and cold blood, empty veins and weakened bones.

The body stands, and Doyoung looks at Jaehyun’s eyes, the once stormy gray replaced with unshed tears and lifeless pools of black. 

These were not the eyes of Jung Jaehyun. These were the eyes of an empty vessel, waiting for its shell to rot away until it would finally be no more. Jung Jaehyun would be no more, and Doyoung did not want that.

But since when have any of Doyoung’s wants ever been granted? Despite eons, he is a child in time. Not even near adolescence. His wants do not matter, yet he doesn’t understand why. He does not understand why, after existing for so long alone and unfeeling, why he falls for a mere mortal. Why the mere mortal he falls for dies cold. Alone. Unloved in the way he needs to be, the way Doyoung wishes he could love him. Why does he have to be the one to take care of such a task after falling for him? He has no say, no jurisdiction over who does or does not die. As Death, it is his duty to carry out tasks. It is who he was, who he is, who he will continue to be.

Oh, how he wishes otherwise.

And then, the mortal he cares for speaks, and he snaps out of his muddled, broken thoughts, his knees shaking as he looks at Jaehyun’s weary, confused face, fear in his lifeless eyes.

Oh, how Doyoung wishes his mortal did not have to feel such emotions.

Soon it would be true.

“What happened?” A smooth, melodic voice asks. 

Doyoung inhales, throat closing up. He hates this, he hates everything about Life and Death and the Before and After. He hates the universe's creation and this world's birth and his birth and most of all, he hates the birth of his mortal, for if he was never born then he wouldn’t have to die. Doyoung wouldn’t have to watch as he fades into nothingness, as if he meant nothing.

To Doyoung, Jaehyun meant everything.

In the end, it didn’t mean anything what Doyoung felt or didn’t feel, because of course it had to be his boy, the one with the sunshine smiles and rosy cheeks and pure soul had to die. He is Doyoung’s weakness in the eons of his creation. Of course it had to be his boy, kindhearted and charming, all pretty smiles and soft skin and oh, those little noises of satisfaction he would make when praised or happy or pleasured. His boy, Jung Jaehyun.

But Jung Jaehyun’s mortal flesh was no more, and he had to dance his last dance with his dying vessel.

“Jaehyun,” Doyoung breathes, voice soft and lulling, as if putting a child to sleep. His name is Doyoung’s first word to him, most likely his only one, and there is an emptiness in Doyoung’s chest, different from before. Before Jaehyun. Before he felt things he didn’t even know he could feel, doesn’t know existed.

Just as Doyoung was starting to get close with Life, ever-present Death, his own self, betrayed him. He lost his sweet mortal because of his own nature, and he felt empty.

Doyoung is snapped from his thoughts once more as Jaehyun moves to step forward, but Doyoung reaches a hand out to him instead, cupping the flesh Doyoung so badly wanted to caress for so long in his fingers. There was no warmth in the hold, no blood to keep Jaehyun’s cheeks the constant rose they always were, the way they should be, but Dyoung does not care.

His boy, his flesh and bones and skin and muscle and all that make up his dying mortal body is in Doyoung’s hands, and if Doyoung could stop time in this moment and stay like this forever, he would, he really would. If he could renounce his immortality to die right then and there with his boy, he would. If he could change his purpose, his whole reason of existence and give it all to the beautiful boy, his boy in front of him, he would. Anything to avoid the inevitable. Anything to avoid watching Jung Jaehyun dance until time bleeds away like his blood on the streets and he must go to the eternal darkness destined for him. 

Jung Jaehyun does not deserve the darkness. He doesn’t not deserve the eternal cold and endless wandering of the Afterlife, the lonely void in which his conscious will exist in, forever, and ever, and ever.

Jung Jaehyun does not deserve that. He deserves a long life with a caring lover and many children. He deserves warmth from his flesh and skin flowing through his veins, heart beating and lungs breathing. He deserves to see the world, to explore the deepest oceans and the tallest mountains. He deserves to look up at the sky and see blue, see sunsets and stars and the beauty of the world, the entirety of life taking home inside his body. 

He does not deserve a cold, dark night, bloodstains pooling on the cracked stones underneath his feet.

Rain begins to fall, and Doyoung feels warmth trail down his face. Despite the taste of salt in his mouth, the wetness if his cheeks, he refused to admit he was crying. He would not cry for his rose-colored boy.

He was Death.

He would cry for no one.

But then Jaehyun smiles sadly, dimples showing slightly and Doyoung feels his heart clench and his lungs constrict. He feels himself split in two when Jaehyun leans forward, placing a kiss upon Doyoung’s forehead, Life forgiving Death.

“Oh,” Jaehyun hums, stepping back. Doyoung reaches out for him, attempting to grasp onto his flesh and get him to stay, to exist in the same space as Doyoung for just a little bit longer but Jaehyun shakes his head, that sad smile gracing his graying features as he fixes his bangs, throwing his head back to get them out of the way of his sight. Doyoung tears up, because that simple action was a habit of Jaehyun’s that he was so, so fond of. 

Another sad smile, another punch to the stomach. 

Doyoung does not want to see Jaehyun sad, and yet he stands there, frozen. He waits for Jaehyun to begin, despite every cell in his body screaming at him to move, to cry, to reach out and touch Jaehyun and hold him forever-

“I understand,” Jaehyun says, flesh beginning to flow in simple, graceful movements.

No you don’t, Doyoung wants to cry, but he does not. Instead, his heart falls from his chest, drops to the ground and rolls at Jaehyun’s feet. In short, simple movements Doyoung watches as Jaehyun crushes his heart with every step, every turn and twirl and flick of his finger. 

Doyoung watches as the honey-haired boy with soft skin and dimples dances his last dance, and he wishes he could look away.

He does not look away. Jaehyun dances beautifully, all graceful movements and straining muscles and glittering skin from the rain falling onto his flesh, molding and seeping into his skin to create a beautiful harmony of life giving its all in the final moments.

If feels like forever. Doyoung wishes it was. His gaze meet Jaehyun’s, the mortal’s movements halt with one final flick of the fingertips, face inches away from Doyoung’s.

Jaehyun catches his breath, eyes hooded. He leans forward, opening his mouth to say something, but Doyoung closes his eyes, shutting them as tightly as he can.

Breathing. Gasping. And then,

Silence.

Doyoung opens his eyes, and on the ground lays what once was Jung Jaehyun. His limbs do not move. His ligaments to not bend. His eyes do not open. His chest does not rise and fall. No blood flows from his unbeating heart, and the pools surrounding him are beginning to fade and wash into the downpour.

Doyoung’s face burns from where Jaehyun kissed him, and for the first time in Death’s eons of existence, he cries.

This will be a performance he can never forget.

**Author's Note:**

> concept is taken from the comment section of lorn’s ‘acid rain’ mv. it’s a really cool song, i suggest you check it out! (o^▽^o)
> 
> also, if ur wondering why jaehyun has gray eyes in this i pictured his appearance as it was in poetic beauty and his collaboration ‘try again’ with d.ear. i also suggest if u haven’t checked that song out, please do!  
> (* ^ ω ^)
> 
> eidt: haha there’s so many spelling mistakes in this (｡T ω T｡)
> 
> thank you for reading!!! ＼(￣▽￣)／♡


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